The Dress by Rebecca

The dress

It is my friend’s birthday soon and I have ordered her a nice new dress. It is going to be green. She really likes green. I am really excited for the dress to arrive because I will be able to check is it the right colour. She will be turning eleven and I am going to make her a home-made birthday card.


It is time for me to open the parcel because my friends dress has arrived. I have opened it and it is the wrong colour! It is purple and she hates purple. I was so cross that it was the wrong colour. THE END BY REBECCA

2 thoughts on “The Dress by Rebecca

  1. Hello Rebecca, well done! You have written this piece in the present tense. I think this is the hardest tense to write in. I like how you made this writing seem very personal by telling the reader about your friend and what she likes, and that you were going to make a card for her. I think your exclamation mark works well “…it is the wrong colour!” as you had been building up the tension until then. Keep writing.

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